Over the past few months of blogging, I have noticed a pattern in the friends my husband acquired in college who now keep up with him through the blogosphere. I believe they may all want to bed him.
Now hear me out on this one. I absolutely love my husband more than anyone else on earth and know, more than anyone, just how special, wonderful, kind, intelligent, handsome and hard-working he truly is. But I’m a little concerned that many of his friends are on the brink of obsession and are possibly blinded by their affections.
Many of you have penned a need for more material from Chris on his blog, which I completely agree with. He truly is a great writer. He doesn’t ramble on just to show how much he knows or use big words just to show the array of his vocabulary, but people, he’s not frickin’ William Shakespeare. And he's not Zeus or something. He’s human, just like you. I know, it’s a shock. Maybe you should read that sentence one more time. Here, I’ll write it again: He’s human, just like you.
Like I said, if anyone knows how great he is, it’s me. Some of you may not think I’m good enough for him, and you know what, I don’t think I am either. But he’s mine! You can’t have him… let go! It’s OK, I’ll get myself together here…
The even better thing about Chris is that when we all compliment him, his head doesn’t grow to the size of Mount Rushmore (or the heads that are on it). But I’m concerned that if this behavior continues, it may start growing. And frankly, Chris’ head is already huge (literally speaking – have you ever noticed? Another reason I’m concerned about childbirth!).
Also, I am actually really sweet and nice to him because he’s my favorite person in the world, but if you guys continue to dote on my husband, I may be forced to my regular evil ways in an attempt to keep him grounded. Capeesh?
Oh, and reality check. You think I’m mean? I am just more verbal about it. He’s just as mean. He tells me a lot of the mean things he’s thinking. Don’t worry, they usually aren’t about you, so there again, he may continue to sit on the pedestal you have all created for him. Bring him down, I say!
OK, OK, in all reality, I didn’t get to dote on him myself during the whole December Dedications thing, so I’ll just say this in seriousness: Chris is the best friend I have ever had and think I will ever have. (I love you, Shannon and Steph, but you girls understand, right?) He knows me inside and out (stop thinking dirty things…), and he loves me anyway. I say anyway, because my faults are pretty obvious.
He is someone I can talk to about anything, and I enjoy being that for him as well. Though we have many of the same interests, it’s some of our differences that allow us work well together. When I can’t think of how the gutter system will work, he can. When he can’t think of how the kitchen sink plumbing will fit together, I can (you think I cuss like a sailor?!). Where I think creatively, he thinks more technically. He is not ultra masculine and I’m not ultra feminine. When one of us is pessimistic, the other is optimistic. He’s a great supporter and a great kisser (had to throw that in)!
I know that I haven’t mentioned my beliefs much on here, but I truly believe Chris is a gift from God. I guess he’s a gift to you all as well!
I could go on, but the head might be enlarging at this point, so I'll stop!
(Sorry this ended up sounding sappy. I could only carry on the sarcasm for so long!)
About Me
- Meaghan
- Rome, Georgia, United States
- Apparently, I'm mean at first! Keep reading and have your own impression.
9 comments:
Yeah, you're right. He's an asshole. I hate that guy.
Any time someone rates another person's kissing ability, I have to wonder: How many people have you kissed that you feel confident in assessing the abilities of others? What makes you an expert?
I like Chris as much as the next guy, but in a completely non-romantic way. So if you were worried about me wanting to hit that, don't be.
You guys do realize the first 3/4 of this is mostly joking, right? Especially the opening paragraph!
Mickey: I don't have a lot to compare Chris to (on the kissing), but I didn't mean it so much as a comparison as I did to say that I just enjoy it. (It's a lie. I've kissed so many guys I lost count in second grade...)
C'mon Courtney. You don't still dream about that night in the Carrier office? Strip darts? Huh? Huh?
Wait. Did that really happen?
No? OK, forget that.
Seriously, I am blessed to have you in my life, too, Meaghan. And I hope my head never even approximates the size of a nostril on Mt. Rushmore, because arrogant self-important people suck.
Isn't it funny how people tend to project? Instead of examining the statements that led you to believe the rest of us want to sleep with Chris, you spent the blog discussing why you want to sleep with Chris. The former would have been much funnier.
Meaghan, you depress me. (sorry had to run this into the ground some more.)
Actually, I think you may have missed my mentioning in the comment section of one of my posts that you were no longer going to be the butt of jokes from me, at least about being mean. I'll at least try to find a new target to pick at that isn't too much of an open wound. It's ok Meaghan. You're not actually evil.
But I think you've missed the truth behind our actions and words. It's not that we respect Chris so much but that he gives us nothing to work with. He doesn't open himself up to much. He's not as free with his quirks as I am. Believe me, I want to mock and ridicule Chris. He just needs to let his guard down. Come on Chris. Give us some material. You SUCK!
Chris, I thought we made a pact not to ever speak of Strip Darts ever again. Not because it's not a fond memory, but because I am legitimately afraid of Meaghan.
Strip darts?
Oh, who am I kidding? I don't give shit.
You were there, Mickey -- apparently just too stoned to remember.
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